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Why did Wart Become a Grey Parrot
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How was the Round Table really created?
Back in the Middle Ages in England there was a kingdom called Camelot where there was peace, prosperity and a blueprint for chivalry all over the earth. This kingdom was created by Merlin the Magician, a very powerful and kind Druid, and it was overseen by the great King Arthur. Before that, the Merlin (of course assisted by his companion, Archimedes the Owl) was the tutor for Arthur when King Arthur was a child. The Merlin taught him many spiritual and earthly lessons; but these lessons were taught by "less than conventional means." The Merlin nicknamed the little King Arthur "Wart" and he turned him into all kinds of animals with his magical powers so that the Wart could learn the valuable lessons from these animals and nature.

Everybody knows that the Wart was turned into many well-known creatures, such as a fish, but did you know that he was also turned into an African Grey Parrot? Here’s how it happened:

"Wart, why do we have wars?" asks the Merlin.

"Because someone attacks," responds the young King Arthur.

"That’s right. They do it for boundaries," adds the Merlin.

"You humans just don’t understand," retorts Archimedes the Owl. He jerks his head in disgust and shakes out the irritation by vibrating his feathers. "You’re always killing off your own blood for those silly boundaries. You’re no smarter than an ant. You don’t realize that MIGHT DOESN’T ALWAYS MAKE RIGHT."

Arthur looks over at Archimedes, squinting his eyes as all children do when they’re very confused. "What are boundaries?"

"Imaginary lines on the earth," responds Archimedes. "When you’re a bird those stupid lines don’t exist. Of course we protect our home territories, but we do it in a different manner. We posture and squawk, but we don’t have gang wars against our own kind, like humans do. But sometimes we swoop down and leave little surprises on top of humans’ heads, and they call that good luck. It’s more fun being a bird."

"Archimedes has a good point. When you see from a higher perspective, there are no boundaries, and so there’s no reason for fighting," says the Merlin. He looks over at Archimedes with a chuckle and gleam in his eye, "You know, way up there humans even LOOK like ants, don’t they?"

"Yea, and humans think that birds just make noises and imitate sounds. But the African Grey Parrot is going to teach them a thing or two in the 90's and beyond. The Grey can talk the human language, and some of them learn things without being taught by humans," adds Archimedes.

"Which 90's, Archimedes?" inquires the Wart with his eyes open like saucers. "Teach me what it’s like to be an African Grey Parrot."

"Eat this carrot," replies the Merlin. Wart chomps down on the carrot with his teeth moving like an electric saw, and as he finishes the last morsel, the Merlin raises his magic wand mumbling incantations under his breath.

WHAM!!! A mighty force surrounds the Wart and sucks him down into a little fluff ball. Then comes a silence. Wart takes a deep breath, and as he peeps meekly through one eye, he sees this silver/gray aura about him. Then he opens both eyes slowly and discovers that this silver gray is really the color of his BRAND NEW ONE-POUND BODY.

Wart cocks his head and looks up with his right eye at the Merlin who seemed to have grown into this towering giant. He switches focus to his left eye to discover the dirt floor of the Merlin’s cave to be only inches away. "This is cool," and he suddenly freezes like a stone at the sound of this gravelly voice coming out of him.

The Merlin looks at the new Wart turned African Grey, "We’ll create a Round Table of African Grey Parrots and special humans who will learn to communicate and teach each other. You will be in charge of each session."

The little Wart fluffs up his feathers and settles on the perch, as this future King of Camelot has a lot of heavy thinking to do.

Inspired by TH White’s classic, "THE ONCE AND FUTURE KING"

copyright © 2000-2006 Margaret T. Wright
 
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